After our vacation in Tennessee, theskinnyonbenny family drove due south, and made our way back across the Gulf coast.

Every week I see more and more Facebook updates about the start of school. Apparently, we started before anyone else, which is fine, because it's too darned hot for the kids to be doing anything else right now anyway. Vanya started Pre-K4, in which they do a little more learning than they did in Pre-K3. By the time he starts Kindergarten, he will have exceeded the amount of school instruction that I ever received in Music, Spanish, or Religion.

On Tuesday, July 28, theskinnyonbenny family found ourselves in a rental house on a lake just West of Knoxville, Tennessee. We were with the Linkin family, and it was this particular day that we had chosen to load four adults and four children into a single mini van, and take the scenic route to the east. Our ultimate destination: Dollywood.

So what happened? The world isn't still making fun of Mel Gibson? But I wasn't tired of it yet!

I find myself busy during the long holiday weekend, so my good friend Mel Gibson generously agreed to author a guest post.

Two little kid stories, but before you skip past, one has some naughty innuendo.

You may have noticed that a very high percentage of the blogs out there have turned into parents writing about their kids. I know it's just not that interesting, but when you have a little kid, you just don't get out that much and find other amusing things to write about. I don't think it's a stretch to say that the quality of American writing is worse just because it's such a pain in the ass getting a babysitter.

The news is tiring of it, but oil is still pouring into the waters of the Gulf Of Mexico as you sit and read. I wish I was in the government and somehow in charge of all of this. Here's what I would do.

Vanya is all-in on an initiative to talk like Looney Tunes. For a couple of weeks, he's been known to throw out a "What's up Doc?" as he eats something that requires bringing hand to mouth. It doesn't have to be a carrot. A pretzel, slice of apple, or even a sandwich will do.

Until I got a text message reminding me, I completely forgot that I told my cousin's new husband, "I think it's great that you were willing to marry JJ, given her non-functioning male genitalia and all."

When you adopt a child, especially one from an orphanage in another country, you have an expectation of watching your sort of weak, sickly kid bat last in the batting order and get playing time only when the game is out of hand. And that's a fine way to go through a sporting life. I played baseball for many, many years before working my way out of the nine hole and right field, and I had fun all along the way.

Last night, Mrs. theskinnyonbenny told Vanya to stop doing something or other. He ran over to me, crying, and sobbed, "Mama, you don't love me anymore!" That's how I'm feeling about my blog this month. I've got nothing -- and I mean absolutely nothing -- new going on that would be at all interesting to anyone. Not that this stops me from writing most other months, but for some reason, it is right now.