March 21, 2005

At the end of Friday concluded the best two days of the sports year. 32 college basketball games, packed in over 12 hours

The White Trash Award:

This one goes to me. I came home Tuesday, stripped down to t-shirt and underpants, flopped down in my chair in front of the TV, and asked Mrs. theskinnyonbenny to bring me a beer (she refused). I stayed right there in front of basketball for at least a few hours.


Innovation Award:

Goes to the scrub at CBS who originally said, "Why don't we just put three scoreboard across the top of the screen instead of one at the top that scrolls." It's thinkers like him that make this nation great.

Get that off my Screen Award:

Promos for the made for TV movie about elvis, complete with sound clips, run while the game is going on. This completely justifies the crime of throwing a Molotov cocktail through the window of one's nearest CBS affiliate.

By the way, by posting the words, "Molotov cocktail" on my site, I become part of Homeland Security watch lists. I hope all of my new government-agent readers enjoy the site.

Get that out of my Speakers Award:

I don't even know what the advertisement is for, but they play the disco classic, "Shake Your Booty." It's a hard song to get out of your head once it gets running. And as soon as you shake it out, there's the commercial again.

Worst Basketball Team Award:

LSU, hands down. Horrible. That's all we're going to say about it here.

Humanitarian Award:

Program people who left Texas Tech/UCLA running on the high-def CBS channel, so I could switch over to that at the end of the UAB/LSU travesty.

Mind Blowing Award

, also known as the Ben is a Nerd Award: Just for kicks, I figured out that there are 9E18 combinations of brackets possible. There are over nine billion combinations of first round results alone. Admittedly, the result where all four 16 seeds beat all four 1 seeds isn't going to happen.

To be honest, I didn't catch but a few minutes of live action on Friday, or I probably would have come up with more.