The Worst Copywriter In History
May 20, 2017
My sister recently left a job where she worked for a real nut. Their business was butt wipes. Pretty simple.
Below is the text from an email that boss man sent the advertising agency describing a commercial he wanted to make. All wording and grammer are exactly as he sent them, with the excitation that I've replaced the brand name with blanks.
Seen 1
Picture
You MUST BE OVER 18 TO SEE THIS VIDEO
Contains Some Nudity
R U Clean R Not? Sponsor bob butt wipes logo
If you like our product or video please like and share
Seen 2
Picture : Hot naked Girls and Guys with private parts blurred .
Speech: would you want to be with these hottes if they don't use Bobs because this is what they look like below.
Picture : dirty skid mark under wear. and clean under wear.
No _____. toilet paper only. They use ____
speech: if you are not using wipes your not clean!
Seen 3
Speech : you don't take a bath with out water!
Picture show a picture of a guy and Girl blur their private parts, dirty all over in a empty tubs wiping themselves with a dry towel separated shots
Speech : Guy saying I almost done just another 20 minutes and the girl saying about 30 for me.
Seen 4 :
Speech: if you your using wipes you need to be using _____
Picture : picture of a guy with a construction belt, topless sweetie holding the Bobs dispenser wiping himself off
Speech : Because _____ has a conveniently locate dispenser that hangs on any toilet paper holder and you don't need to be a handy man to install it.
Picture : show a my little cousin sammy 6 years old installing the dispenser and saying
Speech :Sammy: if I can do it anyone can do it!
Seen 5:
Picture: show a person outside and a bird dropping shit on a person hand.
Picture: wipe bird crap with a dry rag.
Speech: would you wipe bird crap with a dry rag or would you use water? Then why are you using just toilet paper?
speech: Our wipes are all natural biodegradable wipes with Aloe. To make your your skin cool, clean and comfortable, also good for your septic and the environment. Please like and share.