Office Limerick, Emails

It's time for a new limerick.

Believe in it if you dare A blanket made from pubic hair But don't be alarmed It keeps Carla warm As she sits and works in her chair

The background story there is that I happened to be at the urinal at the same time that Tyler was in the bathroom one day. I looked down, and made an observation. "There are enough pubes on this thing to knit a sweater."

Tyler pondered that, and fantasized that as a bazillionaire, he would get someone to knit a pubic hair sweater, just for the novelty of it all.

An hour later, Carla comes to the meeting, clad in her blanket, and the limerick came to me straight away.

While I'm talking about life at the office, here are some emails that I've held on to. These are actual emails, sent to hundreds of people, with only the names withheld.

From: Sent: Monday, May 05, 2008 4:24 PM To: All TLC Subject: Cowboy boots If you have ordered a pair of men’s cowboy boots to be delivered to TLC, please let me know T

From: Sent: Thursday, June 05, 2008 8:19 AM To: All TLC Subject: Who's hungry for Sausage Wraps? I will volunteer to come in early tomorrow morning to cook up some little sausage/crescent roll wraps if you all will help me pay for it. If you are interested and would like to have those tasty little treats in the morning....Dot I’m talking to you....please stop by today and drop off a dollar or two and I’ll buy as much as I collect plus a little more. I'll be buying the food tonight and I'll start preparing them by 7:00 a.m. tomorrow morning so please try and donate today and not tomorrow. I can almost smell them cooking......mmmmmmmmmmmmmm

This was one of many emails that day orgnizing the logistics of making pigs-in-a-blanket the next morning.

From: Sent: Thursday, June 05, 2008 4:37 PM To: All TLC Subject: Strange smell We are aware of the smell and are investigating. susie

I'm in a different building. I have no idea what the story is on this one.

From: Sent: Friday, June 06, 2008 9:09 AM To: All TLC Subject: PIGS IN A BLANKET Last call for "pigs". If you paid, please come get yours, if you haven’t already.

From: Sent: Wednesday, June 18, 2008 1:53 PM To: Reilly Jr., Kevin; Dot; Wassan, Susie Subject: We will have shrimp!!! Hi there, Just got a call from our shrimper. He's on his way in with a load of really nice, big shrimp - 15-20 to pound. He said he has about 1,000 lbs. Due to increase in his fuel costs, his price will be $4.25 per pound. He said he has a couple of hundred pounds of medium shrimp - 36-40 to pound and will sell those for $3.25 per pound. As before, he'll need total orders of at least 800 lbs. to make trip to B.R. on Friday. Please e-mail me directly, ASAP if you're interested. Thanks!!

From: Sent: Friday, June 20, 2008 8:40 AM To: undisclosed-recipients Subject: [SPAM] Temporary Glitch in the Benefits Expert Site - I will notify you when it's back up and running!!! Importance: Low Sorry About this!!!

There is a Temporary Set Back with the Enrollment Site! I will let you know as soon as it's up and running again. Thank you to those of you that have tried to log in already.