Hurricane Season and Other News

June 01, 2004

Does it take a stupid type of person to become a newscaster, or do they just think that the viewers are all much stupider than they are?

On the news this morning, the announcer tried to whip up some concern for the first day of hurricane season. "Experts say that there is a fifty percent chance that this season is more active than normal." Wow. You mean to tell me that an more active season is the same liklihood as a less active season? In other words, that they don't have a clue as to what might happen? And I'm supposed to run out and buy extra batteries and bottled water?

I love the frenzy to buy bottled water and batteries every time a hurricane nears our area. The supermarket shelves will be emptied of both. I'm convinced that people who never drink water buy several bottles, and that people buy AAA batteries without knowing what appliance requires them. Won't they be surprised when the hurricane comes, they change the batteries in their TV remote controls, and they aren't magically transferred to a safer, calmer environment.

The ideal hurricane is just strong enough to provide some impressive weather, shut off the power for the day, pull down some limbs, and keep you home from work. It can't do any real, serious damage, but it still has to get the office to close down, just in case. It's a tall order for any weather phenomena, and my hat is off to God when he pulls off the ideal hurricane.

In other news that I saw this weekend, some Louisiana legislators want to end the homestead exemption (which provides a small part of residential property value to be free from property tax) for homeowners who aren't married. I wish those legislators would just call a spade a spade: introduce some legislation that requires homosexuals to pay more property tax. That opens the door for anything that people do behind their own doors to be taxes, as long as the politicians find it objectionable. Like playing strip poker? Here's a bill for extra property tax. Drinking wine on Sunday? That's fine, but you'll have to pay a little more tax. Have a tendency to eat potted meat? That'll just be an extra $200 for the state.

One thing that they don't object to is chicken fights. I'm not sure why this comes up during Louisiana legislative sessions every few years. Every time, the national media run a little snippet of filler about Louisiana and chicken fights. This is the same national media that entirely ignored the fact that we had a second serial killer in Baton Rouge, and were, in fact living in a city with two serial killers at once. What's wrong with these people?

One last news item from this weekend's paper deserves note: a Prairieville man got pulled over and received a DWI from a deputy. Two hours later, he drove by the same deputy at the same intersection, still drunk off his fanny. Got a second offence DWI just a couple of hours after the first offence DWI. The guy was probably a newscaster.