Coffee, 0 for 3

January 11, 2006

I'm having the damnedest time making a decent pot of coffee at my house.

Sunday morning, I woke up early. Mrs. theskinnyonbenny was out of town, so I had the house to myself. I decided to make a pot of coffee.

Our coffee maker is one of those that keeps a pot's worth of water hot, so that you don't have to wait the couple of minutes to heat the water that you put in. For sure, a good feature on a pot that you use every day. But maybe not on a maker that you haven't used in three weeks.

The first pot I tried was a failure. The preceding three weeks of keeping the water warm had evaporated my reserve, so that all I got was a trickle of really thick, sludgy coffee. It wasn't enough for a cup full, but it wouldn't have been drinkable had there been enough anyway.

For the second pot, I left the same grounds in, and tried with full supply of water. Unfortunately, the amount of coffee grounds I put into the plastic bucket overwhelmed the system. The water coming into the bucket (is there a real name for that part of the coffee maker?) came faster than the water could trickle through the grounds and filter and leave the bottom of the bucket.

The inevitable result was that the coffee started coming out of the top of the machine, spitting brown liquid full of grounds all over the counter, sink, floors, and part of the refrigerator.

By the time I had this cleaned up, I was 40 minutes into my day without coffee. I started pot 3 but with 3 tablespoons of coffee grounds instead of four.

(Note: when I measure tablespoons, I really mean one of my soup spoons, in which I make a big, rounded scoop. I'm sure the actual measurement is nowhere near an actual tablespoon.)

Finally, pot number three made without any disaster. But it was a weak, tasteless coffee. But at least it was hot, and wasn't all over the floor.