Filth

May 12, 2017

I'm starting today's post with pictures of our nice, clean house.

Yes, this is exceptional, but it gets this clean at least once a week. The kids will probably spill a cup of flour all over the kitchen within the next 120 seconds, but for now, this is an accurate view.

There's a reason that I feel like I need to emphasize our cleanliness.

And it's not because my sister's cleaning lady posts before-and-after pictures of her work on her website. That's the most horrifying thing I've ever read. (And yes, she's made the cut more than once.)

It's because Kolya jumped out of my Jeep at school drop off this morning, and sprinted full-bore toward the elementary building. Excited to tell his friends and teacher that he got a fright this morning.

He picked up his backpack to leave for school, only to find it occupied by a giant, dying rat. Fuuuuuuuuck!

Let's back up a little.

Mrs. theskinnyonbenny was working yesterday afternoon, when she spotted a rodent head poking out from the hole in the wall from where a bunch of network cable comes into the room. She sprinted out of there, and we had this text exchange.

I searched for it when I got home, but I couldn't find it. The cat was just lounging on the couch with no worries at all. I figured it poked its head out took a peek, and left. To be safe, I crammed the hole full of steel wool (rats hate it, I am told) and covered it up. Then, I put down a glue trap and locked the room up.

Kolya and I checked the trap this morning. I didn't have my glasses or contacts on, but I could see well enough to know there was no rat on the trap. Had I been wearing them, I would have seen that something had gotten stuck there, eaten the cheese, and then pried itself off. But I didn't.

Fast forward an hour, Kolya screams in fear of the rat in his backpack. I tossed it out the door, and it lay on the ground barely breathing, almost as big as the cat. It was clearly poisoned and close to death, so I'm glad the cat didn't get into a tussle and poison himself in the process. Kolya was a little shaken up on the ride to school, but began to perk up when I asked if he was going to tell his friends or keep a lid on it.

It was a truly nasty morning, and I hope to never have a repeat of this.

2023 update: this was posted in 2017 without its accompanying images. Sorry, they're lost forever to time.